If you say this chick's name thrice over, a door in the floor opens up a she comes out dressed only in wienerbröd and a smile. If you don't know what smile means, look it up. It's a burden being gorgeous. Me and this Danish girl and every homecoming queen from Kansas who's ever come to Hollywood with a dream that turned into porn know this for a fact. People treat you different. Better really. Like much better. Still, we gorgeous people complain about being treated rudely and how we can't get dates and our herpes sores linger longer because God wants to make things even. That's not true, ladies. I'm single and I've been tested. Mildly retarded. Me and Solveig Mork forever. Our children will be so incredibly stupid.
Photo Credit: Nicola D'Orazio